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Meditation: Safe Space for Noticing
Traumatic events are overwhelming to body and spirit while they happen,
and we often remain out of contact with our bodies afterwards. We
dissociate, distract
ourselves, or otherwise avoid noticing what is happening within.
Meditation can create a safe space for re-establishing contact and gently
noticing what is happening in the moment - even if what happens is
distraction, dissociation, and unwillingness to notice. Everything is
accepted without judgment - including judgment.
There, you're meditating!
I had thought that meditation required physical stillness and a quiet mind.
It was a revelation to encounter
Zen Buddhist Cheri Huber's gentle, non-threatening introduction to meditation
in How To
Get From Where You Are To Where You Want To Be.
She says (paraphrased): Sit comfortably, take
three slow breaths, and notice what happens. Okay, now do it again. And
again. There, you're meditating!
Five minute experiment
When I first read her book, there was a lot of crisis and change in my life.
As an experiment, I committed to five minutes of
meditation every morning for a month. It gave me a small island of steadiness
in a sea of change. After the month ended, I knew I wanted to continue.
Do you feel drawn toward exploring safe space for noticing? Check in with
yourself about committing to daily five minute meditations for a specified
length
of time. It can be a week, or a month, or even just a couple of days.
Try it, and notice how you feel about continuing once the experiment
is done.
If you are already an experienced meditator, consider giving yourself
even more permission to notice and embrace your actual experience in
your practice.
Keeping time
In a formal group setting,
someone keeps time and rings a beautiful bell or chime to alert you
to the end of the meditation period. When practicing on your own, you
can choose to use a timer or alarm, or take occasional peeks at the
clock. It's surprising how five minutes can stretch out or pass in a flash
on different days.
Two intentions
There are only two instructions for this type of meditation.
Both are intentions to carry with you as you meditate, rather than
requirements for being successful.
- Sit (or lie or stand) upright
- Count breaths from one to ten, and then start over at one.
Choosing a position
Look around for a location that feels sheltered and comfortable for
your meditation experiment.
You may want to sit upright on a chair, sit cross-legged on the edge of a
pillow, or
kneel with a larger pillow supporting you. Perhaps full lotus position, with
each foot resting on the opposite thigh, works for you. Standing, lying
down, and sitting on the bed under the warm covers (my favorite for winter
mornings) are also options.
You can also choose whether to gently close your eyes, or keep them open
with soft focus. If you're not sure, try it both ways. Which is more
comfortable for you?
As you practice, notice what sitting (or lying or standing) upright means to
you. Is it easy
to let the top of your head float upward with solid support
from your lower body? Do you notice any uncertainty about where upright
is for your body? Notice what arises for you.
Counting breaths
Now that you've chosen a starting position, it is time to bring
your awareness to your breathing. Notice how you know that you are breathing
in and out. Do you hear the breath, feel the air move in your nose, or
feel your chest or belly move?
The goal is to notice your breathing, rather than
trying to breathe in any particular way. As you breathe in, count "one"
in your mind. Follow the breath in, and out. As you breathe in again,
count "two". Continue to "ten" and start over at "one".
It is likely that at some point you'll realize that your attention has
drifted to your thoughts, and you are no longer counting breaths.
Neutrally note "thinking," and begin again at "one". Whether you count
breaths in smooth cycles of ten, or never make it to "two," you are
still meditating.
Noticing the body
As you settle into your chosen position and count breaths,
you may notice sensations from your body: warmth, cold, tightness, ease,
numbness, prickling, aches, releasing, shifting.
You may feel impulses to move or change position.
Notice what those impulses feel like for you. Notice what happens if
you choose to follow them, and if you don't. Remember, this is safe space
for noticing. You are still meditating, no matter what choices you make.
Restlessness
Sometimes, even in a five minute meditation period, intense restlessness
arises. Notice
what happens as you sit with the restlessness and wait for the meditation
time to be over. Since this is all an experiment, you also have the option
of ending early. Notice how it feels to have that choice,
and how it feels if you exercise it.
Already doing it right
In years of daily meditation sessions, my body has learned more
about sitting upright, and I count breaths all the way to
"ten" a little more often. I keep returning because
day by day, I've learned how it feels to already be doing something right,
and gradually I've brought that acceptance into the rest of my life.
I hope you enjoy your experiment with already doing something right, too!
Learn more
I highly recommend How To Get From Where You Are To Where You Want To Be
by Cheri Huber. With stories from her students and from her own life, she
demonstrates a more compassionate way of relating to ourselves, our problems,
and our resistance.
Here is an introduction to formal
Zen meditation, including photos of sitting positions:
http://www.mro.org/zmm/teachings/meditation.php
Let me know what you think!
Did this article spark a response in you? I'd love to hear about
it! Call or email to
share your thoughts.
Buy the book
This article is part of Wellspring of Compassion: Self-Care for Sensitive
People Healing from Trauma, available from
WellspringofCompassion.com,
Powell's Books, or Amazon.
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For a free phone consultation about whether supportive
bodywork can help you add acceptance to your life, call Sonia at
503-334-6434 or
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Copyright © 2010 Sonia Connolly
Section: Connect with Your Self
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